mmmm pilot*s toast
Here*s to me in my sober mood
When I ramble sit and thiols:
Herafs to me in my dnaikrea mood
When 1 gamble sin and drtnlc
But when at last itfs over
And from this world 1 pass
1 hot>e they hury me upside down
So the whole world can kiss my ass
"WARNING"
This ms a word "of warning- a warning to those readers
whose tender sensibilities may, or more accurately will,
be offended by the language of these ballads« But it is
no apology to them* For these are songs that are sung by
flying officers and men throughout the English speaking
world* .They reflect the manners of nan at war, the morals
of pilots who drink to forget for an evening the combat
mission they must fly at dawn* ^an§r of these lyrics were
adapted to the Korean "situation" after becoming pppular
among the same warriors during World War II, and at least
one or'two were sung around the campfires on the eve of
Gettysburg. ..
It follows, therefore, that they are not the product
of a particular degenerate generation* They are instead,
as they always have been, an inte ral part of military life
in the field, no more and no less so than a cold tenfi, bath-
ing in a helmet, dehydrated potatoes and dysentery*
You must accept or ignore them as we accept or ignore
the conditions that inspired their authors to write them
and us to sing them*
(From "Songs My Mother Never Taught Me," 13th Ftr-Bmbr wg)
(From ftSongbook, 357th FIS Nouasseur, Marocu )
(From nSongbook, 42nd FISn)
(From "Songbook, 431st FIS'T)
(From "Other Sources")
THE FIGHTER PILOTS HYMN BOOK was compiled by,
1/Lt Wm. J. Starr
edited and produced for the 79th Ftr Group by,
Capt. Wm*- C* Gatschet
(copyrights are not claimed and anyone desiring may
reproduce, any or all portions at their discretion)
TABLE OF CONTENTS
A BABBLING BROOK
54
A BOMBER THAT FLIES TEN THOUSAND MILES........ 56
ACE IN THE HOLE
47
ADELINE SCHMIDT________________ _ .
... 2
AIN'T IT A BLOODY SHAME________________________.....___....... 49
AIR FORCE SOI ^ _ „
_ 15
A MAN WITHOUT A WOYA'N" "..... 1 __ ~_ _
$7
A NAVY PRAYER_______________________.___________.. ' ......37
AND I LEARNED ABOUT FLYING FROM HIM _
20
ARIGATE FOR THE MEMORIES _______________ZI_L1_ __"_'"" #9
ASS HOLES ARE CHEAP TOD'\Y ________________..... _1
AURALEE_______________________._""' __ I_____"_ _"____T ' " 90
BALL OF YARN_________________ _ _____
68
BANG IT IfflTO LULU_________________,_________________ 103
BARNACLE BILL THE PILOT___ _
16
BATTLE HYMN ________ ' ' 'i'_""__""_'_
........ 90
BESIDE A KOREAN WATERFALL" ......" .......
...... 11
BEER SONG _____________~
Zl 120a
BLACKBIRDS"""^______ '_ _____________ 51
BYE BYE CHERRY _
__ 44a
BLESS THEM ALL ~ _..... ..........."................ 31
BLOOD ON YOUR TUNIC " ___ _ _
__ 29
BOOZIN' BUDDIES _
25
BUDDY _-E*S-B _ __ ___________
S5
BYE BYE BLACKBIRD"~ ~~J ""_ '" ......."'_""_ i__'"""......
92
CALL OUT THE ARMY "AND THE" NAVY _______________________40
CATS ON THE ROOB TOP_______________________________________46
CHICKEN SO NG__________'_________________.....
19
CHITOSE BLUES_________' ___"____.____________
31
CIGSRETTES AND WHISKEY _
31a
CLOVIS__________ " _"_ ....."..... '
"" ' 120
COCAINE SUE_________ _________ ______
86
COLD WINTERS EVENING
~" 7
COME ON AND JOIN SHE AT R TORCE _________;_____Xl"
Si?
COOL----------------------------------------------------------------------------------105
CO-PILOTS LAMENT ___ __ _____________:__________25
CREEPING AND CRAWLING_____________■______________ 109_£S
DIRTY LIL _________"
51
DOODLE*LEE*DOO_____Jl_' _"__"__" __"_ _""""__!"...........68
DO YOU KEN MY SISTER TILLY " ,"~ '" . \ 88
DO YOUR BALLS HANG LOW ' _ _'' _ ______100
DRINKING RUM AND COCA COLA__________________'_______114
DRUNK__________._____________ """ _ "'
' ' 94
EARLY ABORT _ _ _ ~ '"....... ___L
I"_" "..........." 50
EIGHT BUCKS A"DAY """ '___"__' " ' ~......~" " ..... ~"...... "59
FALSIES IN BRASSEIRES " '"_"......"...... ": ~ —74
FAREWELL TO ANTUNG UNIVERSITY _____________
30
FATHERS GRAVE____________________" "'" "
12
FIGHTER PILOTS ________________________________' "54
FIGHTER PILOTS ________'"
........"54a
FLAK IN THE NIGHT
. 62
FLAK SHOWERS____________________________________
"' 14
FOGGY FOGGY DEW_______~"
___"""_"____„_____Z_Z__~""99
FORESKIN FUGITIVES________________________________ ""79
FRIGGIN IN THE RIGGIN " ~
7^
GLORiUS
94
GOj.NG HOME
£2
GOOD OLD MOUNTAIN DEW
29
"Gn SUITS AND PARACHUTES
53
HAIL YOU FIGHTER PILOTS
59
HARRI&AN
94
HAVE YOU TRIED YESSUP
7
HERE'S TO
110
HE BOUGHT A RANCH IN TEXAS HE DID
110a
HERE'S Tu THE REGULAR AIR FORCE
23
HINKY DI
107
HONEY M@S
86
HORSE SHIT
98
HUMORESQUE
109
HUTCH'S BALLAD
33
I AIN'fl} GOT NO USE FOR THE WOI'EN
106
ICE ON THE RICE
79
IF YOU FLY
61
I LOVE A BILLBOARD
109
I LOVE MY GIRL
5
I LOVE OLD WING OPS AND FLYING SAFETY
85
IN FLIGHT REFUELING
84
IN THE SPRINGTIME
103
IN THE TALL GRASS
91
INTO THE AIR
53
INTO THE AIR 69ERS
97
I SAW HER SNATCH
108
ITAZUKE ORT
16
IT'S TRAGIC
97
I USED TO WORK IN (H ICAGO
97
IVAN SKAVINSKI SKAVAR
5
I'VE GOT SIX PENCE
60
I WANTED WINGS
27
I WANTED WINGS (KOREAN VERSION)'
28
I WANT TO GO HOME
59
JOIN THE AIR FORCE
101
KATHUSELEM
52
KEYHOLE IN TIE DOOR
95
KItePO BLUES iKfcP0-5€>NA"TA
8
KOREA
12
KOTEX SONG
10
KUNI*RI AND ANTUNG
32
LAST NIGHT
96
LEADER OF THE GROUP
96a
LEE'S HOOCHIE
36
LET OLE MOTHER NATURE HAVE HER WAY
119
LET'S HAVE A PARTY
112
LETS HAVE A PARTY
112a
LILLY FROM PICCADILLY
74
LITTLE RED LIGHT
99
LOOK AT THE EARS ON HIM '
53
LYDIA PINKHAM
75
MACH RIDERS IN THE SKY
66
MRY ANN BURNS
1
CONTENTS CONT
MAKE ME OPERATIONS
9^
16$£
MEET ME IN KYOTO
MTG ^ 15
44
MINNIE THE MERMAIE
93
MOONSHINE
22
113
93
MOM'S IN BED
MUTHERS HUMPERS BALL
MOVIN ON
63
MUSTANG'S RUN BY MERLIN
g3
MY DARLIN 39
63
MY GOD HOW THE MONEY ROLLS IN
64
THE WILD EYED CADET
59
NAPALM
19
NAUGHT LITTLE DOG
117
NAVY PRAYER
112a
NELLY DARLING
4
NO BALLS AT ALL
6
ODE TO THE B*29
60
ODE TO THE JOC DUTY OPFICER
79
OFF WE GO
18
OH, ITS BEER BEER BEER
73
OH MY GOD
^3
OH RIP TI-E FEATHERS AWAY
2
OH THE #35th IS A VERY FINE SQUADRON
79
OH THEY SAY THAT THIS KIMPO'S A WONDERFUL PLACE 7
OLD BEER BOTTLES
45
OLD GREEN RIVER
76
OLD GREY BUSTLE
66
OLD NUMBER NINE
10A
OLD SOLDIERS NEVER DIE
43
ONCE THEY WERE HAPPY
57
ON TOP OF OLD FUJI
44
ON TOP OF OLD PYONGYANG
44
O'RIELLEYS DAUGHTER
3
OH THE MISERY OF LIVING IN SIN
79a
NATIONAL EMBALMING U
59a
PADDY MURPHY
HO
PARTIES
H
PARTIES BANQUETS AND BALLS
6
PASDE CALAIS
60
PILOTS WOE
60a
PILOTS HEAVEN
102
PILOTS LIMENT
15
PIPER LAURIE
47
PISS ON THE
73
PLEASE DON'T BURN THE SHIT HOUSE DOWN
6
POOR BUT HONEST
46
POOR LITTLE ANGELINE ¥
41
PUSAN U
36
RAIL CUTTERS
63
RED NOSE MIGS
44
3
CONTENTS CONT
RED "SCARFS
g7
RING DANG DOO
65
RIO RIO RIO
g3
ROLL YOUR LEG OVER
77
ROTATIONAL EVE
[{^
SAFE HAND KAIL .
22
SALLY
4
SALOME
32
SAM HOUSTON
105
SAMMY SMALL
1
SAVE A FIGHTER PILOTS ASS
34
SEOUL CITY SUE
53
SEPBSQA
92
SHanty town
112
Show me THE WAY TO GO HOME
35
SIDI SLIMANE BEING
113
SILVER THREADS AMONT THE GOLD
n
SING US ANOTHER ONE DO
69
SIX POUNDS OF BOOBIES
g V
SIXTEEN TIMES
96
SONG OF R AND R
oa
SONG OF THE 13th
6l
SONG OF THE ZULU WARRIORS
26
SuUTH OF THE BORDER-
H6
SPANISH GUITAR
91
SQUADRON SONG
23
STAND TO YOUR GLASSES
26
SSAY WITH GOD
3
STRAFERS
42
STKAFIN1 ROUND THE MOUNTAIN
37
STREET CLEANER SONG
113
STYLES
2
TACHIKAV/A, YOKOHAMA, ITAZUKE
55
TAEGU GIRLS
40
TATOOED L&DY
39
TELL ME WHY
9O
TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS
107
THE AIR FORCE IA MENT
13
THE B-36
7g
THE BALLS OF O'LEARY
79
THE BASTARD KING OF ENGLAND
go
THE BLuODY GREAT wheel
4
THE CAMEL
45
THE CANDEL SONG
gg
THE CHEETAS
gg
THE COED AND THE CADET
£7
THE CO*-MIES LAMENT
104
THE CUCKOO SONG
33
THE FAIRCHILD ABOETION
51
THE FIGHTIN 63th
62
THE FORMATION
59
THE HAIRY CHESTED EI( HT SIX
HO
fHS Jffi'Wck bull ,
81
The AF Has gone to Hell ^
112
THE LITTLE GREY HAT___________________________________________Ji%
THE MID OF THE MOUUTAIH^ffii______________________________b£- -
THE MAN BEHIND THE ARMOR PLATED DESK______________________M_A
THE MISSION_________________________________________£#L *
THE MOST CHIVILROUS FISH__________________;_____'^tl
THE PERSIAN KITTY______,______________________________jg
THE PO RIVER VALLEY__________________________;________j0
THE PRETTIEST SHIP _________________________ \j
THE PRETTIEST GIRL I EVER SAW_________________________33
THE SCOTCH UEDDING____________________________________*jg
THE RIVER RAN RED_______________________________ kZ
THE THING-___________________________
67
THE TINKER________________________________________10
THE WOODPECKER________________________________________76
THOSE WEDDING BELLS ARE BREAKING UP___________________67
THREE WHORES PROM CANADA JUNCTION ______________81
TIE MY ROOT AROUND A TREE_____________________________108
TIPTANKS AND TAILPIPES (THE MALL) _________________12
TITANIC__________________________________________ - 18
TOAST TC THE BLUE ANGELS______________________________________55
TOO LONG AT ITAZUEE______________________________________
6l
TO THE REGULARS
__________________________:__________________24
TO THE TABLES DOW AT SIS!___________________________________115
WO LADIES WSIffl CONFIDING____________________________________93
UNCLE JOHN AND AUNTIE MABLE__________________________________10
VIOLATE
ME______________________________________________________y&
VIRGIN STURGEON _____________________________________100
WE SOLD OUR COW__________________________■_____________12Q
WE HEARD YCU WHEN YOU
SANG___________________________________120-i
WEST VIRGINIA HILLS___________________________________________73
WHEN YOUR LEAVES HAVE TURNED TO SILVER_____________________1^
WHIFFENPOOF SONG______________________________________________95
WRECK OF OLD
'97,_______________________________________________21
YOU CAN TELL A FIGHTER PILOT
11
FIGHTERS PILOTS TOAST
here's to me in my sober mood
v/hen I ramble sit and think
Herei s to me in my drunken mood
when I gamble, sin and drink
But when at last It1s over
and from this world I pass
I hope they bury me upside down
so the whole world can kiss my ass
5
SAMMY SMALL
Oh my name is Sammy Small fuck em all
Oh my name is Sammy Small fuck em all
Oh my name is Sammy Small and ITve only got one ball
But it Ts better than none at all - fuck em all*
They say ITve killed a man fuck em all
they say I!ve killed a man fuck em all
I hit him in the head with a fucking piece of lead
now the silly fuckers dead - fuck em all
They say I!ve got to swing fuck em all
they say ITve got to swing fuck email
They say-ITve got to swing from a fucking piece of string
What a siily fucking thing - fuck em all
The parson he will <o me fuck em a LI
the parson he will come fuck email
The parson he will come with his tales of kingdom come
he can shove em up his bung - fuck em all
The sherrif will be there too fuck em all
the sherrif will be there too fuck em all
The sherrif will be there too with his silly fucking crew
they have fuck all els e to do - fuck em all
I saw molly in the crowd fuck em all
i saw molly in the crowd fuck em all
I saw molly in the crowd and i felfc so fucking prowd
that I shouted right out loud - Fuck Bm All
MARY ANN BURNS
Mary arm Burns was the queen of all the acrobats
She could do the tricks that would give a cat the sh its
Roll green peas from her fundamental orifice
Do a double flip and catch them on her tits
A great big son-of-a-bitch twice as big asme
Hair around her ass like the branches on a tree
She can swim fish fight fuck
roll a barrel dri^e a truck
Mary Ann Burns is the girl for me*
ADELINE SCHMIDT
^here was a young maiden named Adeline Schmidt
She went to the doctor cause she couldn!t shit
He gave her some nlmdicine wrapped up in glass
Up went the wii:dow and out went her ass*
Chorus:
It waTT brown, brown shit falling down
Brown brown shit all around
it was brown brown shit falling down
MyGod how that poor girl could shit
A handsome young copper was walking his beat
He happened to be on that side of the street
He looked up so bashful he Hied up so shy
When a piece ^f brown shit hit him right in the eye.
Chorus
This handsome young copper he cussed and he swore
He called that young maiden a dirty old whore
And on Brooklyn bridge you can still see him sit
"v/ith a si.\n round his neck saying, nBlinded by shit,11
Chorus
Styles (Tune Smiles)
There are styles that show the ankle
There are styles that show the knee
There are styles that have the boys all xvonderin^
Just what the girls are gonna let us see
There are styles that have a tender waning
That the eyes of ve n alone can see
But the style that Eve wore in the garden
Is the style that appeals to me.
OH RIP THE FEATHERS AWAY
Oh rip the feathers away away
Oh rip the f .athers away
Oh the ass of a duck
makes a Wonderful fuck
If you rip tte feathers away
2
OVREILLEY'S DAUGHTER
As I was sitting at O'Reilleys bar
Listening to tales of blood aid slaughter
Came a thought into my mind
Why no shag 0!Reilleys daughter
Chorus
Ficidley-I*E Fiddley*l*0
Fiddley*I*E for the one ball Reilly
Rubby dub dub jig balls and all
Ruddy dub dub shag on
I grabbed that she bitch by the hair
Then I threw my left leg over
Shagged and shsgged and shagged some more
Shagged and shagged til the fun was over
Chorus
There came a knock upon my door
Who could it be but her God-Dam father
Two horse pistols by his side
Looking for the man who shagged his daughter
Chorus
1 grabbed that bastard by the fe ir
shoved his head in a ja il of water
Shoved those pistols up his ass
A damni sight farther than I shagged his daughter
Chorus
Nov/ as I go walking down the street
People shout from eve*y corner
There goes the dirty sd n of a bitch
The one who shagged OfReilleys daughter
Stay with OD (Dashing thru the sno)
The game was played on Sunday in Heavens own back yard
With Jesus playing quarterback and Moses playamg guard
The angels in tie b3e achers my god how they did yell
When Jesus na de a touchdown against the boys from hell
Chorus (Tune Oh, them golden slippers)
Stay with god, oh lordy, stay with god, oh lordy
Jesus on the one yard line, moses doin very fine
Stay with god , oh lordy, stay with god, oh lordy
Hoke em, soke em, Jesus poke em, stay with god
3
NELLY DARLING (Tune Nelly Darling)
Oh your ass is like a stovepipe Nelly darling
And the nipples on your tits ate turning green
There's an odor of blue ointment round your pussy
You are the ugliest bitch that I have ev-r seen
Therefs a yard of lip protruding from your navel
and when you piss you piss a stream as green as grass
ThereTs enough wax in your ears to make a candle
So kindly make one dear and shove it up your ass
SALLY
Sallyfs in the alley sifting cinders
Lifted up her leg and farted like a man
Wind from her bloomers broke six winders
Cheeks of her ass went BAM BAM BAM
THE BLOODY CHEAT WHEEL
An airman told ne before he died
and 1 don!t think that the bastard lied
Ihat he had a wife with a cunt so wide
that she could re ver be satisfied
So he invented a prick of steel
Driven by a bloody great wheel
Two jrass balls all filled with cream
And the who fucking issue was driven by steam
Round and round went the bloody great wheel
in and out went the prick of steel
until at last the maiden cried
Enough Enough, ITm satisfied
But nov- we cone to the bitter bit
'Miere was no was- of stopping it
She- was spit from her ass to her tit
and the who&e fuckirg issue was covered wit h shit
A Babbling Br ok
A babbling brook, a shady nook, a girl all dressed in yellow
Two snow white tits, two ruby lips, oh you lucky fellow
Between the hours of two and four when he began to linger
She said, Young nan if you are through IT11 finish with my finger
So he got up and took a piss, and she got up and farted
He wipedhis jock upon her sock, arri that is how they ja rted
Nine days went by, he heaved a sigh a sigh of pain and sorrow
the pimples pamk were on his dink but ther'll be more tomorrow
Nine months went by and she heaved a sigh a sigh of pain & sorrow
two little mutts, were in her guts but they111 be out tomorrow
4
IVAN SKAVINSKI SKAVAR
Oh the harems of egypt are fair to behold
and the maidens the fairest of fair
The fairest a greek, was owned by a shiek
One abdul abbulbal amer
A traveling brothel was brought into town
3y a Russian who came from Sfar
And a challenge we it wide, as to who could outride
Count Ivan Skavinski Skavar
Now abdul rode by with his hand on his fly
And his jails h anging low with desire
And he watered a million that he could outride
Count Ivan Skavinski Skavar
So this spectacle great was all set for a date
Twas to be referreed by tie C„ar
And the streets were all lined to see harlots entwined
With Abdul and Ivan Skavar
xhey iB t at the track with their tools hinging slack
And the starters gun punctured the air
They were quick on the rise, peoole gasped at the si^e
of Ivan Skavinski Skavar
The cunts were all shorn and no rubbers were worn
iiiid abdul revved up like a car
But he hadftTt a hope against the long greasy stroke
Of Ivan Skavinski Skavar
Nov/ when Ivan had won and was c]e aning hisg^u n
#e bent down to pick up his pair
When something red hot,, up his rear track was shot
And Abdul the bastard was there
^hen the harlots all screamed and the people yelled queen
hey were ordered apart by the C^ar
But so fast were they stuck, it was fucking bad luck
For Abdul and Ivan Skavar
The cream of the joke was when at last they were broke
It was laughed at for year by t he Czar
F r Abdul the fool, had left half of his tlool
In Ivan Skavinski Skavar
I love my girl
I love my girl yes I do deed I do
I love her truly
I love the hole that she pisses through
I love her tits tiddly tits tiddly tits
And her nut brown ass hole
I'd eat her shit gobble gobble slurp slurp
with a wooden spoon
5
NO BALLS AT ALL
There once was a girl named Sara McEox
With hair on her chest and cheese in her box
She married a man named Patrick McCall
With a very short peter and no halls at all
Chorus:
No halls at all
No halls at all
A bery short peter and no halls at all
Ther first night that they were wed
They took of their clothes and went straight to bed
She reached for ids pecker, it was very small
She reached for his balls, he had no balls at all
Now maother dear maother oh what shall I do?
I've married a man who never can screw
I reached for his pecker, it was very small
I reached for his balls, he had no balls at all
Oh daughter dear daughter don't be sad
It was the same trouble I had with your dad
The re1 s many a man who will come to the call
Of the wife of a man who has no balls at all
The dauther went home, took her mothers advice
And found the results most exceedingly nice
A bouncing young baby was born in the fall
To the wife of the man who had no balls at all
PARTIES BANQUETS AND BALLS
( Tune- Take me out to the ballgame )
Parties banquets and balls boys
Parties banquets and balls
As president Truman has said before
There !s only one way to stay out of a war
That's with parties banquets and balls boys
Parties banquets and balls
We'll have parties and banquets and
Banquets and parties
And Balls, Balls, Balls
PLEASE DON'T BURN THE SHITHOUSE DOWN
Please don't burn the shithouse down
Mother has promised to pay
Mother is drunk, father's in jail
Sister's in a family way
Brother dear is mighty queer
Times are fucking hard
So please don't burn the shithouse down
Or we'll all have to shit in the yard
6
COLD WINTER*S EVENING
fTwas a cold winter*s evening, the quests were all leaving
0*Leary was losing the bar, When he turned and he said to the
lady in red,
Get out J Yo"u con!t stay where you are
She shed a sad tear in her bucket of "beer, As she thought of the
cold night
ahead.
Then a gentleman dapper stepped out of the crapper,
And these are the words that he said:
Her mother never told her the things a young girl should know
About the ways of fly, fly hoys and how they come and go.
She's lost her youth and beauty, and life has left its sad scar
So remember your mothers and sisters hoys and let her sleep under
the bar
SILVER THREADS AMONG THE GOLD
Darling let me fiz your garter
Just an Inch above your fenee
And if I should wander farther
Please don*t blame it all on me.
The hair around you puss!s turning silver
The hair around my cock Is turning gold
So let's put our two things together
Silver threads among the gold
So she let me fiz her garter
Just an inch above her knee
And my hand did wander farther
And she pissed all over me
OH THEY SAY THAT THIS KIMPO'S A WONDEREUL PLACE
Oh they say that this Kimpo's a wonderful place
But the organizations a fucking disgrace
There's Captains and Major!s and light Colonels too
With their hands in their pockets and fuck all to do
They stand on the ramp and they rave and they shout
They shout about things they know fuck all about
And for all of their good they might just as well be
A shoveling shit on the Isle of Capri
HAVE YOU TRIED YESSUP?
Save y#u tried Yessup
The best breakfast in the land
Have you tried Yessup
The best breakfast food in the land
Delicious, nutricious, the whole day throught
Jack Hard-On never tires of it, and neither will you
Ch have you tried Yessup,
The best breakfast food in the land
Yes sup-Spelled backwards is Pussy
Spelled bideways is Slur-Slurp
7
SIX FOUNDS OF BOOBIES
(Tune, These are the things I
Love)
Six pounds of "booties in a loose brassier
An old used condrum ie, a glass of beer
A twot that twitches like a mooses ear
these are the things I love
A dirty Whore strolling down the street
A bloody Kotex in the rumbleseat
I love my poontang hut I heat my meat
These are the things I love
EIMPQ BLUES
(Tune, A little bit of heaven fell)
Oh a little bit of shit fell down
Out of the sky one day
And it landed in the Chosen
Oh so very far away
And when the Senate saw it
It looked s fucking bare
They said that!s what we're looking for
We'll send our Air ^orce there
So they sent their ,86ts
Air Base Group and midics tco
«nd they sent the dreaded 33^th
They knew just what to do
And now you'll find the languished
In a place that *s so remote
That all you111 hear those bustards shout,so
Where are these fucking boats
Chorus
I've got those Kimpo Blues
Kimchi Blues
I'M fed up
And I'm fucked up
And I 'm blue
We tried to please Old Sygman
But it really was a farce
The only thing twas left to do
Was shove it up his arse
(Chorus)
Oh we^fouhd oiir Alma Mater
In ahouse in Yong Long Po
The brass got there before us
They showed us where to go
8
MAKE MB OPERATIONS
Don't give me a P-38, the props they conter-rotate
They've scattered and smitten from Burma to Britain
Don't give me a P-38
Chorus:
Just give operations
Way out on some lonely atoll
For I am too young to die
I just want to grow old
Don't give me a P-39
The engine is mounted behind
They111 tumble and spin and auger you in
Don ' t give me a P-39
Don't give me a peter four oh, a hell of an airplane I know
A ground loopin bastard, you're sure to get plastered
Don't give me a peter four oh
Don't gibe me a P-51, it was alright for fighting the hun
But with cooland tank dry, you'll run out of sky
Don't give me a P-51
Don't give me a P-6l, for night flying is no fun
They say it's a lark, but I'm scared of the darS
Don't give me a P-6l
DonH give me an F-84, She's just a ground living whore
She'll whine moan end wheeze and she'll clabber the reees
Don't give me and F-84
Don't give me an old thunderbolt, it gave many a pilot a jolt
It looks like a jug and it flies like a tug
Don!t give me an old"thunderbolt
Don't give me a jet shooting star, it'll go, but not very far
It'll ramble and spout, but soon will flame out
Don't give me a jet shooting star
Don't give me an F-86, with wings like broken match sticks
They'll zoom and they'll hover, but as for top cover
Don't give me an F-86
Don't give me an. F-89, Tho TIME says they'll really climb
They're all in the states, all boxed up in crates
Don't give me an F-89
Don't give me an F-94, it's never established a score
It may fly in weather, but won't hold together
Don't give me an F-9*|
Don't give me an 86-D, with rockets radar and A/B
She's fast I don't care, she blows up in mid-air
Don't give me an 86-D
9
MAKE ME OPERATIONS (Cond't)
Don't give me a C-^5, so slow it stalls out in a dive
A ground loop built in it, and bird colonels in it
Don't give me a C-45
Don't give me a C-5^» six inches of rugs on the floor
And We'll go fat-cat'n, from here to Manhattan
Don't give me a C-5^*
Don't give me a £-45, the pilots don't get back alive
The Mig 15fs chase em, they soon will erase em
Bon1t give me a B-^5
Don't give me a one-double-O, The bastard is ready to blow
The A/B is there, but you're saying a prayer
Don't give me a one-double-0
Don't give me an P-102, it never goes up when it's blue
An all v/eather eoffin, that flames out so often
Don't give me an F-102
THE MAU BEHIND THE ARMOR PLATED DESK
(Tune- Strip Polka)
Early in the morning when the engines start to roar
You can see the old goat standing, beside his office door
He'll be sweating out the takeoff, as he's often done before
The man behind the armor plated door
Four times he's led us up there, and he always led up back
Por he circled o'er the I«P«, as we went in to attack
He said I'm hard yet fair boys, but allergic to ack ack
The man behind the armor plated desk
And when the targets sighted, who inspires the attack
Who says hundreds may go in lads, but a few aren't coming back
Who says We'll disregard the minimum, when you supress the flak
The man behind the armor plated desk
And when the mission1s over, and briefing they should be
You can search the whole field over, but not a pilot will you see
For they'll all be at the 0 Club, with a mixed drink in their hand
Singing the Man Behind the Armor Plated Desk
SONG- OP R AND R
(Tune- Moonlight on the Wabash)
When the ice is on the rice in old Ohitose
And the Saki is the cellar starts to freeze
I don't want to see my wife in San Prancisco
I just want to see my little Nipponese
9-a
kotex som
(Tune, Caissons go Rolling Along)
Youn can tell "by the smell that she isn't feeling will,
When the end of the month rolls around
How she turns, how she squirms, how she gets a case of worms,
When the end of the month rolls around.
For itfs hi, hi, hee, in the Kotex industry,
Call out your sises loud and strong
Super] Junior J----Band-aid
For where are- you go
The blood will always flow,
When the end of the month rolls around,
Keep !em bleedin1 when the end of the month rolls around*
THE TIMER
The lady of the mansion, was dressing for a hall when she expied
a
tinker, pissing up against the wall,
CHORUS:
With his great big kidney wiper and balls as big as three and a
yard and a
half of foreskin hanging down below his knee.
The lady wrote a letter and in it she did say,
I'd rather be fucked by the tinker than my husband any day*
Oh the tinker got the letter and when it he did read,
His bsalls slung o'er his shoulder and his penis by his side.
Oh, he rode up to the mansion he rode up to the hall
Corf Blyne? said the butler he has come to fuck us all
Oh, he fucked them in the parlor he fucked them on the beds,
Lord save us? Cried the chambermaids, We've lost our maidenheads
Oh, he fucked the Duchess standing he fucked her against the
wall,
But when he fucked the butler twas the dirtiest trick of all*
Oh, he rode out form the mansion he rode into the street
With little drops of semen pattering at his feet
Oh, the tinkers dead and buried I!ll bet he's gone to hell
He said he'd fuck the devil and I!ll bet he's done it well
XfflCLE JOHN & AUNTIE MABEL (Tune- Hark t he Herald
Angels Sing)
Uncle John & Auntie Mabel, fainted at the breakfast table,
This should be suffienient warning, never do it in the morning
Ovalteen has set them right, now they do it every night,
Uncle John is hoping soon, to do it in the afternoon„ A---men
10
PITIES
Oh, parties make the world go round
Parties make the world go round
Parties make the world go round
So, let's have a party
We*re never to busy to say hello
We're never to busy to say hello
We're never to husy to say hello
HELLO ~ HELLO - HELLO
BBS IDE A KOREAN WATERFALL
Beside a Korean waterfall, one bright and sunny day
Beside his shatter Sabre jet, a young pur suiter lay
His oarachute hung from a nearby tree, he was not yet quite dead
So listen to the very last words this young pursuiter said
I'm going to a better land where everything is bright
Where whiskey flows from Telephone poles
Play poker every night
We havn't got a thing to do but sit around and sing
And all our crews are women, oh death where is thy sting
Oh death where is thy sting, ting-a~ling
Oh death where is thy sting
The bells of Hell will ring, ting-a-ling
For you but not for me
Oh, ting—a-ling-a-ling, blow it out your ass
Ting-a-ling-a-ling ling, blow it out your ass
Ting-a-ling-a-ling ling, blow it out your ass
Better days are coming bye and bye
YOU CA1T TELL A EIGHTER PILOT
(Tune- Mine Eyes Have Seen the Glory )
By the ring around his eyeball
You can tell a bombardier
You can toll a bomber pilot
by the spread around his rear
You can tell a navigator
By his seztants, maps, and such
You can tell a fighter jockey
BUT YOU CAN'T TELL HIM MUCH
11
FATHERS GRAVE
(Tune- Piccadilly Underground)
Oh they're digging up fathers grave to build a sewer
And they're going at the job at no expense
They1 re disturbing his remains, to make way for outhouse drains
To satisfy some brand new resident, G-or Blimey
How father in his day was never a quitter
And I donft suppose he111 be a quitter now
He111 dress up in white sheets, and haunt those outhouse seats
And no one there will sit but he allowes, Oor Blimey
^ow won't there be some bloody constipation
And won't those bloody bastards rant and rave
Which is more than they deserve, for having the bloody nerve
To bugger about with a British workmans grave
TIPTMES AND TAILPIPES ( THE WALL )
(Tune- Bless them all)
Bless them all, bless them all
Bless tiptanks and tailpipes and all
Bless old man Lockheed for building this jet
Boat I know a giay who is cussing him yet
Cause he tried to go over the wall
With tiptanks and tailpipes and all
The needles did cross, -and the wings did come off
With tiptanks and tailpipes and all
Through the wall, through the wall
Through the bloody invisible wall
That transsonic journey is nothing but rough
As bad as a ride on the local base bus
So I'm staying away from the wall
Subsonic for me and that' s all
If you1 re hot you might make it
But you111 probably break it
Your butt or your neck, not the wall
KOREA
(Tune- I'm Looking Over a Pour Leaf Clover)
I'm looking over a well fought over
Korea that I abhor
One for the toney
^■nd two for the show
Ridgeway said stay
But we want to go.
There's no use explaining
Why we're remaining
We got what we were fighting for
KOREA, KOREA, and diarhea
To make the rice grow some more
12
TBS AIR ?ORCB LAMEST
(Tune- The Battle Hym of the Republic)
Mine eyas have seen the days of men who ruled the fighting sky
With hearts that laughed at death, who lived for nothing hut to fly
But now those hearts are grounded, and those days are long gone "by
The Air "Farce !s gone to hell
Chorus:
G-lory flying regulations, have them read at every station
Crucify the man that breaks them, the Air Forces gone to hell
My hones h:ve felt their pounding throb, a hundred thousand
strong
A mingty airborne legion set tc right the deadly wrong
But now it's only memory4 it only lives in song
The Air ^orce^ gone to hell
1 have seen them in their T-bolts, when their eyes were dancing
flame
I've seen their screaming power dives, that blasted G-oeringTs name
But now they fly like sissies and they hang their heads in shame
Their spirit's shot to hell
jOnce they flew B~26Js through a living hell of flak
And bloody dying pilots, gabe their lives to bring them back
But now they all pl.ey "Clsg pong In "tile oparatioTu* fchack
Their technique1s gone to hell
The lordly flying fortress and the liberator too
Once wrote the doom of Germany, with contrails in the blue
But nnv; the skies are empty, and our planes are wet with dew
And we can't fly for hell
You have heard your pounding 5C!s blaze from wings of polished
steel
The purring of your Merlin was a song i our heart could feel
But now the L-5 chains yon with its moanin groanin squeal
And it won't climb for hell
l«ve yon ever climbed a lightening up to ^frhere the air is thin
Have yon stuck her long nose downward, just to hear the screaming
din
Have you tried to do it lately, better not yourll auger in
And then you1!! sure to catch hell
I have seen them in their Sabre's, when their eyes were dancing
flame
I have seen their screaming power dives that blasted Stalin's name
But now they fly like sissies and they hang their heads in shame
Their spirit's shot to hell
Hap Arnold built" a fighting team that sang a fighting song
About the wild blue yonder in the days when men were strong
But now we1 re closely supervised for fear we may do wrong
The Air force's gone to hell
Vie were cocky bold and happy when we played the angel's game
>Je split the blue with buzzing, and we rolled our way to fame
But now that's all verboten and we're all so goddamn tame
Our spirit's shot to hell (C0nd't)
13
THE AIR jTORCE IAM3NT (COHD*T)
One day I huzzed an airfield with another reckless chap
We flew a hot formation with his win^tlp in my lap
Brit there ls a nev directive and we'll h°ve no more of that
6r yon will hum in hell
Mine eyes get dim with tears when I recall the days of old
When pilots took their choice of heing old or young and "bold
Alas I have no choice and I will live to he quite old
The Air Force Ts gone to hell
But smile awhile my pilots tho your eyes nay still he wet
Someday we1!! he in heaven where the rules have not heen set
And God will snow us how to huzz and roll and. really let—
Ihe Air Force fly like hell
Chorus: #2
Glory no more regulations, rip them down at every station
Ground the gu}^ that tries to make one, and let us fly like hell
VJHH3T YCUH LSAT^S HAViS TUHJLHD TO SILTEEH
(Tune— Silver threads a^ong the gold)
When your leaves have turned to silver
villi you loveus just the same
Oh, we111 always call you__________________
Isn't it a hloody shame
To the days at Itazuke
And the parties that ^Te knew
"hen your leaves h-^ve turned to silver
You can stick them up your flue
FLAX SEC'ffiS
(Tune- April Showers)
Although Fl-k showers, may come your way
They111 hring the panic, that makes you say
My fuel is Josephine, I'm a;oing home
So if you want to stay and fight, ycv may
Stay and fight alone
I've added throttle, I'm on ry way
I111 live to come hack sone other day
So keep on strafing that position
And Knock it out ftr me
I'm just a close supporter, can't you see
14
AIR FORCE 801
(Tune- Wabash Cannonball)
Listen to the rumble, and hear old Merlin roar
Ifm flying over Moji, like I never flew before
Hoar the mighty rush of * the slipstream, and hear old Merlin
moan
1*11* wait 4'Tv£t emd'-eay & prayer, and hope it gets me home
Itazuke tower, this is Air Force 801
I ln turning on the downwind leg,. my prop has overrun
My coolant !s overheated, the gauge says 1—2-1
Youfd bettor get the crash crew, and get them on the ran
Air Force 8il this is Itazuke tower
I cannot call the crash crew, this is their coffee hour
Tnn7re not cleared in the pattern, now that is plain to see
So take it on around again, we have some VH^s
Itazuke tower, this is Air Force 801
ITm turning on the final, and running on one lung
ITm gonna land this Mustang, no matter what you say
I!ve gotta get my charts fixed up, before that judgement day
Itazuke tower, this is Air- Force 801
I'm turning en the downwind leg, I see you biscuit gun
My enginers runnin ragged, and the coolant's gonna blow
Ifn gonna orang a Mustang, so look out down below
Air Force 301, this is jud^emant day
You're in pilots heaven, and you are here to stay
You just bought a Mustang, and you bought it vill
The famous iiir Force 301 was sent straight down to hell
piiiTS iahsht
(Tune- If I Had the *ings Of an Angel)
Now listen all you pilots and you airmen
-<e will tell you a story sad but true
Of many who near wings but are not happy
Gather round while we sing this song to you
The many who '-ear wings but are not happy
^ear a smile on their lips, not in their hearts
They1 re overjoyed to wear the badge of an airman
Biat are sod in getting off to such bad starts
A reason there must be for discontentment
Why tho gloom as dark as any blacked out loop
Just ask them one and all and they will tell you
ITro not a member of the 312th Fighter Gro.-p
15
PILOTS WOE
Prom the runways down at Yotmgstown
To Geneva on the lake
To the dear old Airway Inn, we love so well
You will hear the folks all say
Ho matter where you go
It*s the 86th that always leads the way
We1 re poor JET PILOTS
Without any pay
Wefre all "been grounded "because it*s too hot
We!re doomed to set here till eternity
Oh lord just give me a Mrd thats got A/B
AIR FORCE EIM
Prom the Biltmore in Los Angeles
To the motels in Berdoo
If the Navy asks a lady
She will say to hell with you
If the Amy or the Navy
Ever gaze on heavens shores
They will find the Angels shacking up
With the U.S. AIR FORCE........\
TO WOMAN
Here!s to woman,, the human vine
Buds each month, and hlooms in nine
The only thing this side of hell
That can empjry the nut without cracking the shell
Here's to that moment of sweet repose
When it!s helly to belly and toes to toes
And after that moment of sweet delight
It's ass to ass for the rest of the night.♦♦« .«♦
15A
P^JRSJLOL^ J? ILL TnJ THAT
(Tuae- Barnacle Pill the Sailor)
The idr Corps ±Q the life for me, said Barnacle Bill, the Sailor
I111 jump my ship and leave the sea and he an aviator
I'll fly so high ITli reach the sky, gravitation Ifll defy
I111 make the people moan and cry, said Barnacle Pill, the Sailor
Pretty soon You* 11 lose that grin, said the fair young maiden
Pretty scon yen111 lese that grin, said the fair young maiden
I lm rough and tough, I know my stuff, said Bill, the Aviator
I'll fly this ship till tfve had enough, said Bill, the Aviator
I'feno^x-'i strut? I knots'a fin, I knew a "barrel roll and a spin
I know a prop, I knew a knick, and I knew an elevator
Ton1 re out of gas and must go dcwnf wailed the fair young maiden
lou1 re cut of gas and must go dov-nf wailed the fair young maiden
I!m a cokeyed Finn if Ifll give in, roared Bill the Aviator
I1!! fight this ship with a flyers grin, reared Bill, the Aviator
He kicked the har and nulled the stick, which didnH seem to do
the triek
And he hit the ground like a t^n of trick, poor Barnacle Bill,
The Sailer
Here13 sop-e flowers f-r his grave, s'^hhed the fair y.'^ung
maiden
Here!s s^me flovers f-^r his grave, s^tfeed the fair young maiden
ITAZUK^ ©RT
(Tune- When ynu wore a tulip)
Vhen yr/u flew a Mustang, and I flew a Mustang
In the Itazuke OBT
Other pilots vent to "briefing
kro stayed in the sack a1 sleeping
Hotter sVnes you'll never see
vfe were hotter than tacasco, when gr^-up pulled each fiasco
^e excelled in proficiency
When y--.u flew a mustang, and I flew a Mustang
In the Itazuke OAT
1-Li.hJT Ks IE KYGT6
(Tune- *vk3et He in St* Louis)
Meet me in Ky-to, M~t-
^eet eg at the shrine
Take y<-ur sh^es ^ff when y-u enter
Or yu!li pay a fine
l*e will have s-'-me sukiyaki
Then we111 h?ve a cup of saki
If y-u111 meet me in Ky--t", Mo to
Meet me at the shrine
16
COfcJ OH AivD JOIN THS AIR Jf3GJS
O-me ~n and j-in the "Air Jorce, we1 re a hajny "band they say
T e never d^ a lik of work, just fly around all day
While others "-rk and study hard, and so-^tf gr^w nld and "blind
~^e!ll take to the air without a care, and y-u will never mind
Chorus:
You'll never mind, you'll nevar mind
Oh, come and join the Air iP^rce
And Y-u will never mind
Cime ~n and get promoted as high as yu desire
You're riding <m a gravy train when youJre an Air T^rce flyer
But just when you1 re ah out to he a general you1!! find
The engine c-ugh, the wings fall ~>ff, and you will never mind
Y ufre flying over the ocean, ym hear your engine spit
You see ymr prop cme to a stop, The god damn engine^ quit
The ship won't f l^at, you cannot svim, the shore is mi!es "behind
Oh, what a dish for the crabs and fish, hut you will never mind
I fly up t- the Yalu, in my ln-86
And here's one thing that you can sent to- Congress in your TWX
Ixye only, go-t one engine, Jack, and if that bastard q its
It will be up there all by itself, cause I will shit and git
Oh, someday you'll meet a Mig-15, He !li sh~ot y-u down in flames
No use in belly aching and calling the "bastard names
Y-^u1!! lose your wings, d^.nrt worry mac, another pair ycu!ll find
You'll fly with Fete and the angels sweet, and yu will never bind
Oh, ¥e?re just a hunch of Air F-rce lads, and we d^nJt give a
dam*
About the groundling*s p'int of view and ail that sort of ham
We want a hundred thousand shi^s of each and ev-ery kind
And new we ve got cur own Air IPcrce, so we will never mind
How we*re the operations hunch, and ve don't give a damn
About those paper shufflin tyues, with heads just like a ham
;'e w^nt a hundred ulanes or so, ail ready on the line
And they c n pad those swivel chairs, and ve will never mind
Oh, come and get your brassy rank as high as you desire
You!re riding on a ravy train, when you*re in the iidmin1 mire
Tr.e ones and fours have room for more, or s: they always find
-fith nor.es in place, ve dcn!t mean en the face, you will never
mind
17
TITANIC
th, they "built the ship Titanic, and when they had it through
They thought they had a ship, that the water would n4f*r come
through
But the lord almighty* s hand, said the ship would never land
It was a ad when that great shij; went down
Chorus:
0h it was sad, -©h it was sad
It was sad when that great shi]> went down
T# the bottom of the----
Husbands and wives, lttie bittie children lost their lives
It was sad when that great ship went down
THvas r>xx a tuesday mornt they were nearing 3nglands shore
Ana the rich refused t^ associate with the poor
So* they -out the poor below where they were the first to go
It was sad when that great ship went down
They were nearing Englands shore and were heading for the d**ek
';-hen the old ship Titanic "began to reel and rock
fh the captain tried t" wire huth the wire ^'as on fire
It was sad when that great ship went down
Then the ship lie^an to list, and the lights began to flicker
And a drunk cried out, my G--d where Is ny likker
3c they grought out the settle and they passed it all around
It was sad when that great ship went down
They swung the lifeboat? out, o'er the dark and stormy sea
And the band struck up with Nearer My God to Thee
Little children wept and cried as the waves swept o'er the siie
It was sad when that great ship went down
?}!£> LITTLE GR«ilY HAT
Oh the pale moon shone on the tar—room floor
The bar was closed f~r the night
Then rait of his hole came the little gvej rat
He lapped up the lienor on the tar-room floor
Ind bp,ck on his haunches he sat
And all night long you could hear him call
Bring on your goddamn cat
•ff ws Gt
(Tune- USAF S-.mg)
Sack we come, off of a ^-ne hour test hop
JFrniT; nVer the land and over the sea
For tuis feat we get a raise In rank
Ten days leave, and a WG
£eros all, as you can judge by medals
dot a lot, and we'll get some mere
1 e're ^ut to conquer, and ve will
For nothing can stop the U#S# Air Force
18
KAFAlM
($uije~ Titanic)
It was up by scnori where the Yalu meets the 9ea
I was out on a recce to see what I could see
Vhen I spied a farmer man with his pitchfork in his hand
It vas sad when my napalm went down
Chorus: It was sad, oh it was sad
It was sad when my napalm went down (hit the farmer)
There were husbands and wives
Itty "bitty children lest their lives
It was sad when my napalm went down
It wa* up "by Euniri where I won my TfFC
I was out '-■n a recce to see what I could see
When -1 spied a church below and I let my rochets go
It was sad when those rockets went down
Chryus: ^t was sad, oh it was sad
It was sad when those rockets went down (^it the steepL^)
All the people ran like hell
When those rockets hit the hell
It was sad when those rockets ^ent down
It was up by Sinanju where I knew that I was through
The 5$Ts and the kOls had shot my turbine through
It vas shen I hit the silk, oh my {lod I strained my milk
It was sad when the rilot wont down
Chorus: It was cad, ^h it was sad
It was sad when that pil-^t went down (Hit the bottom)
Ihere were husbands and wives
Itty bitty children lost their lives
It vas sad when that pilot went down
CHICKS SitfG
^e had some chickens, no eggs would they lay
e had s^-me chickens, no eggs would they lay
My wife said, honey, it * s striking me funny
ire!re losing money, no eggs would they lay
6ne day a rooster flew Into the yard
And caught the poor chickens completely off £:uard
Ihey(re laying eggs now, Just like they used to
Ever since that rooster, flew into the yard
They're laying eggs now, just like they used to
ever since that rooster, flew Into the yard
1«-
Afl-p I ISARSBl^ A3«i.JT FLYIflG- FROM HIM
(Tune- I learned about 'Women From Her)
Ifve * handled the*stick and the'rudder
I've flo^n quite a.lot in my tine
I1ve had my share of instructors
And sAme of Vhe "bunch were fine
A bowlegged fellow from Princeton
And one that: was drained *at fornell
And a fellow fjom Brooks;' but they gave him the hooks
And the Shavetail that gave too hell
The fellow from prinyeton was steady
He taught me to t:ake6ff and land
He1d set her do'wn on'three point6
And loop her to beat tke bani
But when I went up for a solo
The Jennie was steady fend trim
Veil, I landed that ship, hut I busted my kip
And I learned ab-ut flying form him
The man ."for •ornell was a had one
A snn-of~a~£cun I will say
The dirty tail-spin he gave me
^ill last for many a day
I donated a luneh to the cockpit
But'he dived an*; he spun her again
He gave me a howl when I ducked for the cowl
And I learned ab^ut flying from him
The fellow from" Brooks used the G-os^ort
And he talked through a lung rubber tube
All that I heard was he swearing
He spotted me for a boob
Z111 never forget one bad tailspin
He yelled, kick the rudder you siim?
3ut I dionTt kick, I just wiggled the stick
And I learn eel about flying from him
At last I came to formation
And took a fact ship from the line
I made the first turn a humming
And brought her back upright just fine
I sped up the ship without thinking
And hit number two in the wing
And—When I got well, the CQ gave me hell
And I learned ab^-ut flying from him
I've handled the stick tuid the rudder
I*ve flown auite a lot in my time
I]ve had my share of instructors
And some of the bunch were -fine
But take some straight dope from a flyer
An A go with the navy to sea
JV-r the ships they have there can laod anywhere
-and learn about flying from me«
2K
WE .OK e?,JL7) *97
There were 5*7 airplanes warming up on the apron
Not enough rnom you couli see
Sov the first ninety-six were of recent construction
3ttt the last on vas a ?iffcJr-one 3)
She v?as old !97 and she had a fine record
But she hadn't "been flown that year
;And she creaked and groaned w'nen they started her engine
."For she knew that her time wo.s near
A Second Lieutenant va der'ed into operations
And he asked £'>r a ship or two
And they said, -Young man, we are very short of airplanes
But we*ll see what we can do.
nHow the first forty-seven are reserved for Majors
And the Captains have the next forty-nine
Put there's one more ship m the end ::f the apron
The lost ship upon the line •
He was headed for ;vV-nciu and -fr^jm there to Ohinhae
And he had to make that flight
So he said, "O.K., if y-u give me a clearance
I will get there sometime tonight*
Oh, he flew over laej---n and the Taegu airstrip
And the ceiling began t-■ fail
And the clouds closed d-^wn on the tops of the mountains
And he couldn't see the grouni at ail
'^rle flew through rain and he .flew through a snowstorm
Till the light began to fail
*vhen he found a railroad going in his direction
^nd he said, ':l!il get there by raii.n
i-e 1-uew d"wn a valley and he dodged through the mountains
And he kei,t that road insight
Till the rails disappeared through a hole in the mountains
And he ended his last long flight
There was -Id 971 >'ith her n-se in the mountain
And her wheels upon the track
And her -throttle was "bent in the forward position
Put her engine was facing back
IT-vw ladles release listen and. heed my warning
Prom this time ever on
Never speak harsh w#rds to your f'iyboy husband
Ee may leave you and never return.
21
SAFE HMD MIL
(Tune- Wreck of the Old 97)
They gave him his orders at old Itazuke
Saying, "Bill, you're 'way "behind time"
Take this aafe hand mail in your way weary mustang
And put 'er in Nagoya on time
Bill turned and he said to his /black, greasy, crew-chief
nIs my spam-can ready to roll?
Just head !er down the runway and open up the throttle
And I111 call Camel Control/1
There was one dark cluud between Bofu and Nagoya
But Bill was a gauge pilot bold
It was in this cloud that he spun all his gyros
And his Mustang did three snap rolls
He came roarin' down the "bottom doin' a million miles an hour
When the tip-tanks came off with a scream
They found him in the wreck with his hand on the throttle
Still flying the Tokyo "beam
Ifare-thee well, oh fare-thee well
Old Bill broke his mustang all to hell
There111 be no more suki-haki at good old Itazuke
Fare-thee well, oh fare-thee well
MOONSHIBB
(Tune- You are my Sunshine)
You are my moonshine, my only moonshine
You guide my fighters, when skies are grey
I chase your bogies, from here to Moji
Just to find they have gone the other way
The other day boys, as I was flying
I.heard moonshine controller say
"I've got a bogie down by Kurume
Won't you head your jet that-a-way?"
He said he had me in radar contact
And I believed him like a dope
I flew to Moji - and still no bogie
He had chased a fly across the scope
You were my moonshine, my only moonshine
How cor.Td you let me down this way
My chute was swingin1 - they heard me singin*
Won't you take that moonshine away
22
HERE'S TO THE REGULAR AIR FORGE
(Tune- My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean)
In peace time the regulars are happy
In peace times they1 re happy to serve
But let them get into a fracas
and they'll call out the (rod Damn reserves
Chorus: Call out, call out
Call out the God Damn reserves, reserves
Call out, Call out
Oh, call out the Cod Damn reserves
Here's to the regular Air Force
They have such a wonderful plan
They call up the God Damn reservist
Whenever the shit hits the fan
They call up every old pilot
They call ud every young man
The reservists they go to Korea
The regulars stay in Japan
Here's to the regular Air Force
With medals and badges galore
If it weren't for the God Damn reservist
Their ass would "be dragging the floor
Chorus 2: Fight on, fight on
Fight on, regular Air Jcrce
Fight on, fight on♦.
Fight on, fight on
Fight on regular Air^Force
Fight on
SPRING TIME ON THE YAHJ
(Tune- When It's Spring Time in the Rockies)
When it's spring time on the Yalu and the Mig!s come out to play
And the contrails run in circles, fighter pilots earn their pay
We'll hold our triggers steady when our sights are zeroed in
We'll hold our glasses ready when they pass out rum and gin
When it's spring time on the Yalu and the napalm is in bloom
And ynur 50*8 do the talking and it's just a Mig and you
Once again you'll hear me whisper that my fuel is running low
When it's spring time on the yalu then it's time for us to go
23
TO THE SECULARS
(Tune- Mr. and Mrs*_ Mississippi)
I won t forget korea
I canf t forget Kunsan . - <•.
Tor Syngman Rhee and Joe Stalin
Have made me fell at home
I flew across the bombline
And got a hole or two
But all I got was a crock of shit
From yon and yon and yon
Chorus: Oh I was called to risk my ass
and save the U.E". too
But all I got was a crock of shit
From you and you and you
The AA was terific
The small arms were intense
While flyboys "bombed the front lines
The division did the rest
While the regulars held their desk jobs
The reserves were called en masse
For the U.1T. knew the air reserve
Was the one to save their ass
I love you C-r>ar old USA'
With all my aching heart
If I hadn!t joined the damn reserves
We'd never've had to part
But xve won't cry and we won't squawk
For we are not alone
For one of these days the regular1s !11 come
And we can all go home
How we don't mind the hardships
We've faced them in the past
But we wonder if our congressmen
Have had forties up their ass
We have to fight to save the peace
That's what the bastards said
But when you check the casualties
you111 find no senators Tead
I'm going to raise a family
When this war is through
I hope to have a bouncing boy
To tell my stories to
But someday when he grows up
If he joins the air reserve
I'll kick his ass from dawn to dusk
For that's what he!ll deserve
24
CO PILOTS LAMENT
(Tune- The cowboys Lament)
I'm the co-pilot. . . 1 sit on the right
It's up to me to be quick and bright
I never talk back, for I'll have regrets
And I must remember what the captain forgets
I make out the flight plan and study the weather
Pull up the gear and stand by to feather
Make out the mail forms and do the reporting
And fly the old crate when the captain is snoring
I take the readings and adjust the power
Put on the heaters when we're in a shower
Tell where we are on the darkest night
And do all the book work without any light
I call for my captain and buy him cakes
I always laugh at his corny jokes
And once in a while when his landings are rusty
I come through with, "Gaud, but it's gusty,"
All in all, I'm a general Stooge
As I sit to the right of this man scrooge
But maybe some day with great understanding-
He111 saften a bit and give me a landing
BOOZBP BUDDIES
A fighter pilot lay dying
The medics had left him for dead
All around him women were crying
And these are the words that he said
Take the tailpipe of my stomach
Take the burner out of my brain
Take the turbine out of my kidney
And assemble the unit again
Por we are the boys who fly high in the sky
Bosom buddies while boozin'
We are the boys they sent out to die
Bosom buddies while boozin'
Up in headquarters they sing and they shout
Talking of things they know nothing about
We are the boys who fly high in the sky
Bosom buddies while boozin
Bosom buddies while boozin
Bosom buddies while boozin
25
STAND TO YOUR GLASSES
A poor aviator lay a-dying
At the end of a "bright summers day
And his comrads were gathered around him
To carry his fragments away
Oh, his "bird was pil&d on his wishbone
And his engine was wrapped round his head
And he wore a spark plug on each elbow
Twas plain he would shortly be dead
Oh, he spat out a valve and a gasket
As he stirred in the sump where he lay
And to his sorrowing comrades
These brave parting words did he say
I'll be riding a clud in the morning
With no merlin before me to course
So come along and get busy
Another lad now wants the hearse
Take the manifold out of my larynx
And the cylinders out of my brain
Take the piston rods out of my kidneys
And assemble the engine again
With rusted fifties and rockets
ith pilots as old as they seem
We fly these worn out mustangs
Against the MIG-15
Forgotten by the land that bore us
Betrayed by the ones we held dear
The good have all gone before us
And only the dull are still here
So stand to your glasses steady
This world is a world full of lies
Here*s a toast to those dead already
And here's to the next man to die
SONG OF THE ZULU WARRIORS
Ay sigga sumba suraba srumba
Ay zigga zumbg, zumba zay
Ay zigga zumba zumba zumba
Ay zigga zumba zumba zay
Hold fem down, you Zulu warriors
Hold !em down* you Zulu Chiefs
Chiefs Chiefs Chiefs
Chi-ga-ma-lie-----oh
26
I WASTED WINGS
I wanted wings till I got the god-damned things
Nov; I don't want them any more
They taught me how to fly then they sent me off to die
I've had a "belly full of war
You can save those Zero's for the god-damned heros
Distinguished flying crosses do not compensate for losses, Buster
Chorus: I wanted wings till 1 got the god-damned things
Now I don't want them any more
I1!! take the dames while the rest go down in flames
I've no desire to he burned
Air combat spells romance, but it makes me wet my pants
I'm not a fighter I have learned
You can save those Mitsubitsi's for those other sons-o-bitches
Cause I'd rather lay a woman than be shot down in a
Grumman,-Buster
ITo^r, I'm too young to die in a damned old PBY
That's for the eager not for me
I won't trust to luck to be picked up by a duck
After I've crashed into the sea
Caused K'd rather be a bell hop than a flyer on a flat top
with my hand around a bottle not around a god-damned throttle,-
Buster
How, I'do&'t care to tour over Berlin or the Ruhr
Flak always makes me "nark my lunch
I get no Hey,. &ey, when they holler bombs away
I'd rather be home with the bunch
For there's one thing you can't laugh off
And that's when they shoot your ass off
For I'd rather be home buster with my ass than with a cluster,
Buster
They feed us lousy chow but v/e stay alive somehow
On dehydrated eggs and milk and stew
What will they think of next they'll be dehydrating sex
And on that day I'll tell the coach I'm through
For I dearly love my humpin1, and I'd love to do some pumpin'
But KJd rather come with chowder, than to come with lumps of
powder, Buster
How the day that we bomber Metz, I ran out of cigaretts
I always smoke one for my gut
They mr.ke them by the ton, but I haven't got one
Oh what I'd give to have a butt
Now the home front may be pitching, but I still will do my
bitching
Till I find some real sharp cookie, who can mass produce some
nookle,-
Buster,;
27
I WANTED ^ING-S
(Korean Version)
I wanted wings till I got the god-damn things
Now I don't want them any more
I don't want a tour in Korea that's for sure
I've had a belly full of war
I do^'v want my fanny frozen
In tirictt putrid land of Chosen
Fighting MI&'s of Uncle Joe's
In an atmosphere that's frigid frozen, buster
I wanted wings till I got the god-damn things
Now I don't want them any more
I don't want to die over Antung in the sky
MIG-'s always make me barf my lunch
For me there's no Hey, Hey, Screaming
Bogies that-a-way
I'd rather be hone with the bunch
Now there's one t hing yon can't laugh off
And that's when they shoot your ass off
I would rather be home buster
With my ass than with a cluster, Buster
I wanted wings till I got the god-damn things
Now I don't want them any more
SQUADRON SONG
Oh, we are the boys from the 3-8-6
You've heard so much about
Mothers keep their daughters in
whenever we go out
We're always full of whiskey
We're always full of booze
0hr we are the boys from 3-8-6
Now who the hell are youse
As we go marching
And the band begins to P*L*A*Y
You can hear the people shouting
Raggedy Razz, Raggedy Razz
3-8-6
Whowawa
Who owns this club, whowawa
Who owns this club, whowawa
Who owns this club, the people cried
WE own this club
WE own this club
Three eighty sixth squadron we repliedj1
28
GOOD OLD MOUNTAIN DEW
Chorus: They call it that good old mountain dew
And them that refuse it axe few
I111 hush up" my mug if you111 fill up my jug
with that good old mountain dew
There1s an old hollow tree, down the road here from me
Where you lay down a dollar or two
Then you go round the bend, and when you come back again
Tour jug is full of the good old mountain dew
My brother Bill; has a still on the hill
Where he runs off a gallon or two
The buzzards in the skyt get so drunk they con't fly
Just from smelling that good old mountain dew
How my cousin Mort, he is sawed off and short
Only measures bout four foot two
But he thinks he's a giant, when you give him a pint
Of that good old mountain dew
My old aunt June, bought some brand new perfume
And it had such a sweet smelling phew
But to her surprise, when she had it analized
It was nothing but good old mountain dew
The flak gets so thick, that it makes you feel sick
When you've been on a rail cut or two
But you'll never abort, if they'll give you a snort
Of that good old mountain dew
BLOOD ON YOUR TUNIC
An Air Force Lieutenant to Pusan did stole
He'd just come back from a raid on Seoul
When an old M,P„ Sgt said, "Pardon me, sir
There's blood on your tunic and mud on your knees.11
Chorus: La de a, La de a
There !s blood on your tunic
And mud on your knees
$ow look here Sgt, you bloody damn fool
I!ve just come back from a raid on Seoul
Where ack ack is flying and comforts are few
And brave men are dying for bastards like you
Now the old M.P« Sgt said, "Pardon me, sir
But on the Lt# I meant no slur
But the girls down the pusan are hard to please
With blood on your tunic and mud on your knees."
29
THE PO RIVER VALLEY
(Tune- Red Hiver Valley)
To the Po river valley we're going
For to get us some trains and some tracks
But if I had ay say-so about it
I!d still he hack hone in the sack
Come and sit by my side at the briefing
Do not hasten to bid me adieu
To the Po river valley were going
And I'm flying four in flight blue
We went for to check on the weather
And they said it was clear as can be
Now I lost my wingnan 'round the field
And the rest augered in put at sea
S—2 said there's no flak where we're going
S-2 asid there's no flak on the way
There's a dark overcast o'er the target
I'm begining to doubt what they say
A spitfire went by like a whirlwind
And a mustang went by like a breeze
And a C-46 with one feathered
Went by towing five L-3Js
To the Po river valley we're going
And many strange sights we will see
But the one there that held my attention
Was the flak that they threw up at me
FAREWELL TO AUTOTG UNIVERSITY
Farewell to Antung University, I have risen to reality
Forty thousand is no place for me, with MIG-15's in the vicinity
^ith cannon balls flying all around, Makes me wish that I'd
stayed on the
ground
I should join the infantry, or take the navy and go out to sea
Where did red leader go, when I called out "Bingo"
That's what I' like to know, just where*n hell did he go
He called "Red flight, BREAK RIGHT," all I did was tuck in tight
He climbed up in the sun and that's where the fun begun.
Plashes behind me, flashes all around
Flashes above me, and flashes on the ground,
I called "Red leader, where in the hell did you roam?
Clear yourself and ride the mach cause I am going home]"
30
BLESS THEM ALL
Bless them all, Bless them all
The needle, the airspeed the hall
Bless all the instructors
„Who taught me to fly
Sent me up to solo and left me to die
So if ever your blow jet should stall
You1re due for one hell of a fall
No lillies or violets for dead fighter pilots
So cheer up my .lads. Bless them all
Bless them all, Bless them all
The long and the shoH and the tall
Bless all the sergeants
The sour puss ones
Bless all the Corporals and their dopey sons
Cause we're saying goodby to them all
The long and the short and the tall
-There1!! he no promotions this side of the ocean
So while we are here bless them all
CHIfOSE BLUES
(Tune- Cigareets and Whiskey)
Once I was happy and had a dear wife
I had enough Yen to last me for life
I met with a Josan and we went on a sp^ee
She started me smokin! and drinkin! Saki
Chorus: Cigareets and Saki and wild wild Josans
They'll drive you crazy, they111 drive you insane
Cigareets and Saki and wild wild Josans
They'll drive you crazy, they'll drive you insane
I went to Asmuchi, a hath for to take
I met me a Josan who was on the make
The bath it was hot and the Josan was too
If you go to Asmuchi my "boys you are through
I went to my room, some sleep for to get
She said no sleep boy, with me there's no sweat
I woke the next morning at quarter past ten
She says, "Hey Yankee, thats four thousand Yen,"
I'm back in Chitose where we sing and we shout
Me and the Doc are sweating it out
He gave me some pills from a jug on the shelf
Then he poured out a dozen or two for himself.
31
CIGiffiETTES MD WHISKEY
Once I was happy when I was a lad
We had no sweat when we flew the Spad
They sent me to YHG-, the Duces to fly
Since that time, live been ready to die.
Take it from me hoys, its quite a plane,
Enough dampners and juices to drive yon insane
Goes from the ground to forty at gate
But after that Pinker ton will want yon to wait.
Delta wings, Q, pots and a crazy cockpit
It1!! drive you apeshit, it'll drive you insane
Ho push rods or cables to bank it or drro
Just turn on the dampners and ride it alive.
Pinkerton tower is built out of glass
It's forty feet high and really has class
They give you s«me trouble when leaving the ground
The Cleveland-center $ust won't let you down
CHORUS:
Pinkerton and Cleveland and wild wild G-asbag
Theyfll drive you ape shit they111 drive you insane
Emergency experiences and ATC clearances
They111 drive you ape, they111 drive you insane.
31A
KUNI*BI AND ANTUNG
(Tune-Cigareets and Whiskey)
Once I was happy and had a good deal
Flew Fox-Eighty-Sixes at old Victorville
They asked for a volunteer, said, "I&L1 take you"
The next thing I knew I was stuck in Taegul
Chorus: Kuni-ri and Antung, and wild wild Pyong-yang
They'll drive you crazy, they111 drive you insane
Quad fifties and forties and one hundred sorties
They111 drive you crazy, they111 drive you insane
We go down to briefing while it is still night
We lift off the runway before it is light
We form in the gloom and we're off on our way
We1 re over the target before it is day
We1 re up to the Yalu, there's cons overhead
We think of the Wheels who are snug in their beds
We drop our big tips and we break to the right
"Josie" we cry -with all of our
