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The Jolly Trades-men SOMETIMES I am a Tapster new,And skillful in my trade, Sir, 1 fill my pots most duly,Without deceit or froth, Sir: A spicket of two handfuls long,I use to occupy, Sir:And when I set a butt abroach,Then shall no beer run by, Sir. Sometimes I am a Butcher,And then I feel fat ware Sir;And if the flank be fleshed well,I take no farther care Sir:But in I thrust my slaughtering-knife,Up to the haft with speed Sir,For all that ever I can do,I cannot make it bleed Sir. Sometimes I am a Baker, And bake both white and brown Sir; I have as fine a wriggling-pole, As any is in all this town Sir: But if my oven be over-hot, I dare not thrust it in Sir; For burning of my wriggling-pole, My skill's not worth a pin Sir. Sometimes I am a Glover, And can do passing well Sir; in dressing of a doe-skin, I know I do excel Sir: But if by chance a flaw I find, In dressing of the leather; I straightway whip my needle out, And I tack 'em close together. Sometimes I am a Cook, And in Fleet-Street I do dwell Sir: At the sign of the Sugar-loaf, As it is known full well Sir: And if a dainty lass comes by, And wants a dainty bit Sir; I take four quarters in my arms, And put them on my spit Sir. In weavering and fulling, I have such passing skill Sir; And underneath my weavering-beam, There stands a fulling-mill Sir: To have good wives' displeasure, I would be very loath Sir; The water runs so near my hand; It over-thicks my cloth Sir. Sometimes I am a Shoemaker, And work with silly bones Sir; To make my leather soft and moist, I use a pair of stones Sir: My lasts for and my lasting sticks, Are fit for every size Sir; I know the length of lasses' feet, By handling of their thighs Sir. The Tanner's trade I practice,Sometimes amongst the rest Sir;Yet I could never get a hair,Of any hide I dressed Sir,For I have been tanning of a hide,This long seven years and more Sir;And yet it is as hairy still,As ever it was before Sir. Sometimes I am a Tailor,And work with thread that's strong Sir;I have a fine great needle,About two handfuls long Sir:The finest sempster in this town,That works by line or leisure:May use my needle at a pinch,And do themselves great pleasure. [Anonymous]
SOMETIMES I am a Tapster new,And skillful in my trade, Sir, 1 fill my pots most duly,Without deceit or froth, Sir: A spicket of two handfuls long,I use to occupy, Sir:And when I set a butt abroach,Then shall no beer run by, Sir.
Sometimes I am a Butcher,And then I feel fat ware Sir;And if the flank be fleshed well,I take no farther care Sir:But in I thrust my slaughtering-knife,Up to the haft with speed Sir,For all that ever I can do,I cannot make it bleed Sir.
Sometimes I am a Baker, And bake both white and brown Sir; I have as fine a wriggling-pole, As any is in all this town Sir: But if my oven be over-hot, I dare not thrust it in Sir; For burning of my wriggling-pole, My skill's not worth a pin Sir.
Sometimes I am a Glover, And can do passing well Sir; in dressing of a doe-skin, I know I do excel Sir: But if by chance a flaw I find, In dressing of the leather; I straightway whip my needle out, And I tack 'em close together.
Sometimes I am a Cook, And in Fleet-Street I do dwell Sir: At the sign of the Sugar-loaf, As it is known full well Sir: And if a dainty lass comes by, And wants a dainty bit Sir; I take four quarters in my arms, And put them on my spit Sir.
In weavering and fulling, I have such passing skill Sir; And underneath my weavering-beam, There stands a fulling-mill Sir: To have good wives' displeasure, I would be very loath Sir; The water runs so near my hand; It over-thicks my cloth Sir.
Sometimes I am a Shoemaker, And work with silly bones Sir; To make my leather soft and moist, I use a pair of stones Sir: My lasts for and my lasting sticks, Are fit for every size Sir; I know the length of lasses' feet, By handling of their thighs Sir.
The Tanner's trade I practice,Sometimes amongst the rest Sir;Yet I could never get a hair,Of any hide I dressed Sir,For I have been tanning of a hide,This long seven years and more Sir;And yet it is as hairy still,As ever it was before Sir.
Sometimes I am a Tailor,And work with thread that's strong Sir;I have a fine great needle,About two handfuls long Sir:The finest sempster in this town,That works by line or leisure:May use my needle at a pinch,And do themselves great pleasure.
[Anonymous]
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