If you sing this song and are willing to talk of where & when you
learned it, please email me at
or call me at 1234567890. Thanks! John Patrick.
If I Was A Merry Maid.mp3
He'd shout "Fire!" I'd shout "Fire!"
We'd both shout "Fire!" together
We'd be all right, in the middle of the night
Shouting "Fire!" together
If I was a merry maid
Which thank the Lord I'm not, sir
The kind of man that I would wed
Would be a Number Two, sir
He'd ram it home, I'd ram it home
We'd ram it home together
We'd be all right, in the middle of the night
Ramming it home together
If I were a merry maid
Which thank the Lord I'm not, sir
The kind of man that I would wed
Would be a Number Three, sir
He'd lay it on, I'd lay it on
We'd both lay it on together
We'd be all right, in the middle of the night
Laying it on together
If I were a merry maid
Which thank the Lord I'm not, sir
The kind of man that I would wed
Would be a Number Four, sir
He'd shove it in, I'd shove it in
We'd both shove it in together
We'd be all right, in the middle of the night
Shoving it in together
If I were a merry maid
Which thank the Lord I'm not, sir
The kind of man that I would wed
Would be a Number Five, sir
He'd set the fuse, I'd set the fuse
We'd both set the fuse together
We'd be all right, in the middle of the night
Setting the fuse together
If I were a merry maid
Which thank the Lord I'm not, sir
The kind of man that I would wed
Would be a Number Six, sir
He'd shout "Another!", I'd shout "Another!"
We'd both shout "Another!" together
We'd be all right, in the middle of the night
Shouting "Another!" together
Notes: This is a bawdy military variant of better known "Rugby Song". The
informant, Mrs. T, learned this from her brother in the Canadian military. This
is used as a mnemonic to teach what the various gunnery positions do. The
"number 1" is the crew chief, the "number 2" is the loader, the "number 3" is
the gun layer (he operates the gun site), "number 4" is the other loader (works
with "number 2"), "number 5" ammunition handler & sets the fuse, number 6 is his
assistant.
