If you sing this song and are willing to talk of where & when you
learned it, please email me at
or call me at 1234567890. Thanks! John Patrick.
Nellie 'Awkins.mp3
Melody - ???
I first met Nellie 'awkins down the old Kent Road,
Her drawers were hanging down,
She'd just been with Charlie Brown.
I put a filthy tanner in her filthy rotten hand,
'Cause she was a dirty old whore,
Oh she wore no blouses,
And I wore no trousers,
And we both wore no underwear. (The pack: Get it up, get it up, get it up)
When she caressed me,
She damn near undressed me,
What a pleasure, no man knows.
I went to the doctor - he said,
"Where did you knock her?"
I said, "Down where the green grass grows."
He said, "In less than a twinkle,
That pimple on your winkle,
Will be bigger than a big red rose."
CHORUS:
- Won't somebody make my rhubarb rise,
Dada dada da da,
Oh my rhubarb refuses to rise
To its natural size,
Market gardenin' size,
Oh my rhubarb refuses to rise
'Cause my baby don't love me,
My baby don't love me,
Oh my baby don't love me no more.
...........................................................
...........[missing durex verse]..............
...........................................................
...........................................................
I caught a dose of pox a year ago, (a year ago, a year ago)
I thought it was the clap and it would go.
But the more I waited, the worse it grew,
Now I've got galloping knob rot.
What can I do?
The other day I lost my starboard ball, (starboard ball, starboard ball)
And now the other one's begun to fall,
I'm wasting away, I'll be sorry someday,
'Cause then I'll have no balls at all.
Performance notes: When you sing "Where did you knock her? Down where
the green grass grows." You make a hand gesture parallel to the ground.
